GOVERNANCE COLUMN: Governance Lessons Learned From Children’s Games

By Andrew J. Sherman

In his seminal book, Too Many Bosses, Too Few Leaders, Rajeev Peshawaria observes the following:

“Leadership cannot be learned in a classroom, nor automatically acquired by accepting a big title or position of authority.  Leadership needs to be discovered and there is no shortcut to the discovery process.”

Peshawaria argues that leadership is a choice, not an entitlement.  Leaders must have the skills to not only govern the company, but to truly inspire cadres of supporters – both inside the company’s four walls and out – who understand the organization’s goals and mission and who work to embody them every day.

So, where does our journey towards learning the skills and lessons needed to be an inspired leader and informed board member begin? At childhood, but not necessarily in the classroom (as Peshawaria observes), but during playtime.  As I always suspected as a child, it turns out that recess really was more important than sitting at my desk.

We can learn a lot from playing sports on the field and by playing games around a kitchen table.  And of course, dial forward a few years, and we are also learning from advanced graphics video games and from electronic and shared community games that we can play online from our laptops, tablets and smartphones (as evidenced by my family’s addiction to Words with Friends, I now have the most limited vocabulary in the household).

At a core level, from sports and games we learn lessons of teamwork, strategy, patience and persistence, concentration and focus, dignity and respect, creativity and innovation, finding our most effective roles, the joys of winning and the pain of losing, of learning from our mistakes, of learning to take turns, of the need to learn and then follow the rules (or there will be penalties), of the lack of control over outcomes, of the role of luck and chance in our lives, of one need to accept and overcome challenges, of the fact that each of our lessons has consequences and ultimately of the need for good sportsmanship.

We embrace the joy of spending time with one another and we learn that, with some coaching, chemistry, cooperation, and communication, that people with varied skills, interests, abilities and characteristics can learn to work well as a team and commit to compensating for each other’s creativeness and that in working together, the sum of the parts can truly be greater than the whole.  They learn to park egos at the door and that the best interests of the team must always come ahead of the individual.  Great athletes are less concerned with their individual statistics or performance than they are with the outcomes of the team.

From sports and games, we learn that feedback does not mean failure and that the term “constructive criticism” is not an oxymoron.  From sports and games, we learn that while practice does not always make perfect, it can certainly increase the odds of success. From sports and games, we learn the importance of role-playing and that different skills are needed to play different positions.  From sports and games, we learn the importance of taking turns and that if you are not pleased with the outcome of one of your “at-bats” or “spin of the dice,” don’t get discouraged because another one is right around the corner.  From sports and games, we learn that success is truly the intersection between hard work and circumstance.

From games we learn basic skills and insights we need for life: Trivial Pursuit (knowledge in the form of facts); Scrabble (spelling and vocabulary), Chess (patience, strategy, thinking ahead), Clue (thinking analytically, creatively and outside the box, connecting the dots to solve a mystery), Monopoly (negotiation, asset management, budgeting), Life (the reality of your circumstances and uncontrollable life events and the need to adjust accordingly), Chutes and Ladders (as quickly as we can climb, that’s how fast we can fall – take nothing for granted) and Operation (have a steady hand and get things right the first time).

From a leadership and governance perspective here are a few of my favorite life lessons which I have learned from sports and games:

Whack-A-Mole – for every problem your solve, two or more are likely to appear, so don’t spend too much time celebrating your victories.

Monopoly – don’t put too many eggs in one basket – diversify your portfolio and if a strategy begins to yield success, then double-down until market conditions begin to change.

Hot Potato – Risks shifts back and forth in every negotiation of a transaction, but at some point, one buzzer goes off (e.g. the closing) and someone will be left holding the hot potato.

Battleship – In every relationship or situational analysis, start with trusting your instincts, but then shift to educated guesses and informed decisions as your due diligence yields more facts and understanding of your circumstances.

Hide-N-Seek – You can run, but you can’t hide forever – – eventually you’ll be found and will need to start the process anew.

Tag – leadership and fortunes will shift – stay agile and pay attention and you will never be the “it” indefinitely.

Charades – think carefully through what you are trying to communicate to others and with the right hints and encouragement, they will share your vision.

The Last Straw – if you put too much pressure on the back of any one person’s (or camel’s) shoulders, they will break down – learn to delegate and prioritize key tasks.

Lego – learn to create great things from the cards you have been dealt and the tools you have available – use your imagination to be a visionary.

Street Basketball – if you can’t dribble, then learn to shoot.  If you can’t shoot, then be a great defender.  If you want to rebound, learn to box out.  If you are not the tallest, then be the smartest or the toughest.

Weebles – life presents us many challenges, the key is to learn to wobble without falling down.

For insights on being a better leader, go back to your roots.  Think about the things you did as a child that were fun and helped you succeed and build on those in the workplace and in the board room.  Be inquisitive, collaborative, persistent (yet patient), and always strategic — look for ways to win as a team.  Be a rule learner and a rule follower (unlike Monopoly, there is no real “Get Out Of Jail Free” card).